When I was a little girl I thought that our family car was the only one really driven by people. I don’t know where the idea came from, but I thought that the other cars on the road were driven by robots. I remember sitting in the back of our red Camry riding down the road in my hometown and being surprised to find someone else’s mom or dad in the drivers seat of a car near us.
Around that same age I also thought that when you were an adult you never sinned and you always knew the right answers. For as long as I could remember, I looked forward to being a grown up so I could stop messing up. I thought that right and wrong was black and white and the purpose of growing was to know all the answers.
Somewhere along the way I figured out that isn’t true. I don’t know the exact moment when I realized adults messed up as much as kids, sometimes more. That adults don’t have it all together it was just a matter of perspective.
This has been a continual process for me- learning to see the world through a different perspective. To recognize the shades of grey and the complexity of issues. The weight of the decisions and the mistakes are even greater as an adult than when you are a child.
It’s funny though- when I was little I couldn’t wait to grow up to figure it all out and my little perfectionist mind was already striving to have it all together. Now, as an adult, I find myself sometimes wishing to be that little girl who had life so easy and where messing up just meant missing an episode or two of Small Wonder because your incessant robot talking got the best of your mom.
That’s the thing about perspective, it holds the key to the entire picture. Perspective can be freeing, allowing you to see vastness in one moment while a subtle shift can be suffocating only allowing a small glimpse at the bigger picture. Sometimes you have to back up to see things differently, more clearly.